Conan O’Brien meets Von Miller meets happy dead chickens

In a video with over 2 million views in 3 days since getting published, popular comic/talk show host Conan O’Brien has NFL guests on his Clueless Gamer segment. This on account of the great American consumerist bonanza called Superbowl.





One of the guests, Von Miller, an all-blinged up footballer, briefly shares a dream with O’Brien, one that reflects the poor state of critical thinking in America and elsewhere regarding how other animals are fucked over by humans.

We all now know “factory farms” are bad, right? All the darkness and the crowded conditions and the cages. No life to live. But there’s a (not-so-)new trend out there–“happy meat”–and Von Miller wants in, convinced that the idea he has changes jack shit except in allowing folks to make more money while soothing consciences.

O’Brien–no friend to chickens–says to him, One of your dreams is to have a poultry farm, is that right?

Yes, sir, replies Miller. I’ll have commercial farms all over TV.

You want a whole bunch of farms and you want TV commercials?, O’Brian goes.

Yeah, TV commercials, says Miller. I want to have a live feed inside the cages where you see how happy my chickens are.

And O’Brien says to this, That’s a great advertisement. “Our chickens are so good, you can go on TV, you can watch the chicken living a good life–living a good life (Von Miller goes)–living a good life, O’Brien carries on…

Just before you eat it.

Both laugh.

You read right: Good life. Chicken slaughtered after a few months of being stuck in a cage under absolute surveillance of CCTV hooked to a voyeuristic gaze. The chicken, that hapless slave, is of course an “it”. “Poultry”. As usual.

Again we have seemingly nice folks sharing the dumbest naivety surrounded by folks that don’t give a shit. Well now we can enjoy a fucking game over a KFC bucket, yeah?

Change your mind, Miller. Get a better dream, will ya?


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